The Unknown
I've been spoiled over the last three days, spoiled with beautiful comments, surprises, emails, spoken words, gifts, pictures, flowers and views. They make me sigh... in a good way that is. I had a bit of a struggle for a week being left in the dark about the whereabouts of the one who brought back joy into my life. But that week made me realise some valuable things and while two were apart it brought two closer than ever. And how sweet it was to find the surprise of an unexpected homecoming after all those days wondering how and where he is, moving thousands of kilometres in only a few days.
Last week the unknown caused a stomach ache and a constant restless feeling. I had to take it slow because of the RSI problem so there was no distraction which made things 'worse'. This week I know it will be much easier to adjust. Extremes bring you either discomfort or utter bliss and my life seems to be going from one extreme to another on different levels and somehow totally out of control and then again not. There's one thing I learned over the last ten years which is to let go of certain control. These days I'll try to just let things happen and balance somewhere in the middle like a tightrope walker in my own circus.
Time has come to 'let go' again and prepare for another period of unknown but it feels different. Certain situations force you to look at things from a different angle, probably one you were reluctant to try but when you do, you realise it's actually better since it's forcing you to adopt a more direct approach. Making you aware of things taken for granted and showing to appreciate instead. I was told once, some words could grow old and lose their meaning over time when said too often. I don't agree, it's how they're received/perceived by the other, whether he/she is willing to hear the true meaning and value this accordingly.
You either choose to see or you don't... I learned not to wait for the right moment because there is no such thing as the right moment, here and now is all I've got. And so I feel I should say what I want to say, or do what I want to do without having second thoughts. Which is exactly what I did over the last three days and because of that I can 'let go' not having to think about the 'ifs', 'could'ves', 'should'ves' or 'would'ves'. Intense? Yes! But at least I can say I genuinely chose to live that moment, besides, nothing comes easy being a Capricorn and deep thinker... 
Other:
- I just had my 10000th hit on this website *hehe*
- RSI is much better but I'm still not pushing it so will visit your blogs but I still might be just reading
- Slowly getting back to work again, my client is waiting for some progress on their online shop
- Monica, thank you for my award! It's my first I will collect and write soon, how sweet of you!
There is a book that I think you would enjoy... maybe you've already read it.
It's by Eckhart Tolle and it's called "A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose".
Hugs sweetie, your life is beautiful!
BTW the RSS feed on my site most definately broke. I put a RSS feed link to the FeedBurner one that works good on the upper left part of the site. :)
Mon
Would you believe me if I said you wrote exactly what I needed to read at this very moment? I've just found your blog and this is the very first post I've read... and I'm hooked. I think I might re-read this several times, there's a great wisdom in this post and it deals with the thoughts I've been having these days. You know what? I think the right moment DOES exist. It's now, always :)
Monica: hi gal, I must be scatterbrained... I thought I already left you a comment here but totally forgot that I went over to yours this morning *hehe* I figured out your feed btw. I just kept trying in my reader and it seems fine now. The book you mentioned sounds wonderful and I'm gonna order it or perhaps it's time to visit the amazing Art Deco Library here.
I so want to take pictures since it's a 'new' discovery but I don't think they will let me. I'm sure you would love it ;) I had to go there to vote a few months ago, my first in London *hehe* I'm gonna give it some thought, you'll find my pictures if they allow me! Hugs deary! :)
Bitter Chocolate: hi there! Welcome to my blog :)
I'm happy to hear my thoughts had such a positive effect on you, that's always a true compliment, thank you! :) You're also right about 'the right moment' I think we both are trying to say the same thing: the half full, half empty glass theory *hehe*
I hope you'll find your answers soon :) and thank you so much for your visit!
ps Bitter Chocolate: the best :) I tried 90 percent the other day... a lovely combination with coffee and a big piece of chocolate cake... ;)
Okay, well... um, I gave you another one. :) Sorry, but um..... it's just that.... well, hey, you can post two anyway or just hold on to the thought. LOL
ONLY when you feel better.
as for scatterbrained, you have NO idea !
I'm with you on that sentiment!
Love and Light,
Monica
http://www.zyriana.com/?p=651
I have been reading a bit of Zen stuff and your post reminded me a lot about it :) It is important to live the "now", this moment :) because as you well pointed out, at the end of the day it is pretty much what we've got :)
Monica: *hehe* stop spoiling me will ya? :p
Kidding, but thank you so much for the lovely gesture, I appreciate it and I finally got around to posting about it too. I'm sorry it took me so long! You and me both scatterbrained? *LOL* Could be fun *hehe*
Wen: nice to hear about Zen :) You always surprise me which is wonderful, please write a post about your thoughts one day, it would be really interesting to read your views on things [Zen, Taoism etc.] And may I ask what triggered your interest in Far East philosophy?