Culture Shock

Things have been good for a few days now. I seem to be able to accomplish a lot more once I set my mind on it, which leaves me feeling good about myself. I try to set a goal each day and instead of not being able to finish those 20 things that were on the list before, I do finish a few a day now which makes it all less stressful. The silver lining is starting to show which is good.

I had my first job offer today through this major website, I never expected any reaction because my CV has been on there for ages while I was still living and working in the Lowlands. I will be using agents anyway because I won't find a job through the regular channels, too specialised. I won't be able to apply for this job because it means I will have to relocate and I'm just getting into the system here in London. Also chances of finding a job here are better even though there will be more competition.

There are many people trying to help me with certain things that need to be done and I'm very grateful for that. Something that was simple to me before like writing my CV becomes a problem here, although people have been telling me to trust my gut feeling and do it my way [which is the striking creative way; I've sent out nicely packed boiled eggs once and found myself having to choose between a few major advertising agencies]. They basically confirmed my feelings which is good, so I try to trust my gut feeling these days and will come up with a unique way to present my CV.

I'm getting help with writing, it's more complex over there than in the Lowlands. Maurice is helping me with all sorts of things and I'm so happy I have met him. He's Dutch and has been living here for seven years. He's in a business which is slightly similar to mine so he knows the tricks. I've put the CV at the bottom of the list for now because it will be a complex and time consuming thing and there are other priorities at the moment. It's just nice to know people who are willing to help you out in finding your way through the system. Stuart also gave me really good advice and lend me an ear when I needed to get things of my chest, he moved from London to Amsterdam, his blog is hilarious, so go check it out!

It's good to hear from others [like; my best friend Inge who moved to Scotland seven years ago, Maurice, Stuart] who were in the same situation of moving countries, that there are certain feelings and emotions you'll have to go through in order to deal with the new situation. Some things that you take for granted in your own country become a struggle in the host country. It takes time to adjust to these things. I hoped for help dealing with these emotion when we moved here, I never asked for solutions, just someone to turn to when I would have problems adjusting. I know I can deal with things, it was never a problem and it still isn't. I'll trust myself to find my way and it all seems to work out now, with a little bit of help of those who know best from their own experience.

Tomorrow I'll start the Flash 8 Actionscripting course, which is exciting and I'm really looking forward to it. It will be a three days course, intense but fun, something I wanted to do for a while but I never succeeded in finding the right course in the Lowlands. This is by Adobe, very expensive but I was offered a £150 discount last week when I sent an email to make an enquiry, so I couldn't refuse. A. kindly offered help, so we went there by Tube last Saturday to check it out. We had a good weekend together, went shopping down town on Saturday and ended up sitting on a terrace drinking and enjoying the weather. We went for a four hours walk in a nearby forest/park on Sunday, it was so relaxing.

Yesterday I went to the hospital by tube and agreed to meet up with A. at the reception of the hospital. I got the results back and I'm clear of bad cells. I'm healing well, although it takes quite a long time. The consultant showed me the pictures she took and explained to me what they've done during surgery, where they took the biopsies from. I'm healthy which is a tremendous relief and now I can finally move on. We went to a pub near the hospital to celebrate and had another one at the South African pub around the corner from where we live.

I take each day as it comes and I feel positive. I will get there, I just know it.

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The symptoms and stages of culture shock
Initially, the excitement of a new situation is challenging and enjoyable. You look forward to meeting new people, seeing new places and opening yourself to new experience. Typically, however, the very newness of it all becomes overwhelming. What at first seemed exciting looks alien, sometimes even frightening. You may feel very lonely, have sudden mood swings, you may overreact to trivial events and have strong feelings of homesickness. Some people even experience physical symptoms such as sleeplessness or aches and pains. This, the second stage of culture shock, is the most difficult phase to deal with. It is important to remember that it is entirely normal and that it will eventually pass. As you become more familiar with the host culture, you will gradually find that you can re-evaluate it and some of the new life patterns will become attractive. You will be able to settle into the new way of life with a more balanced attitude.

Dealing with the difficulties
When you face the second stage of culture shock, it is important to look for sources of support and help. If you are working in a foreign country, then try to find co-nationals with longer experience of the new environment than you. You will be able to discuss your reactions with them and swap experiences; you will also be able to talk about your home country and share your feelings about how living abroad affects you. Try to set up a network of such contacts with whom you can exchange; in fact, generally acknowledge that you need links to your own culture so that you fell less cut off and alone. Make full use of electronic connections too. Use e-mail and chat facilities to keep contact with family and friends. In today's world, there is often no need to be totally cut off from your background.

[Excerpt from an article ©1999 by Brenda Townsend Hall]
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